In my opinion, there is nothing good about feeling or being bitter towards a situation that hurt you. What do you achieve by being bitter? Nothing, other than tormenting and disrupting your own energy and peace.
When we find ourselves in a situation that cause us to feel hurt, naturally, our emotions can and do take many forms. Feeling sad, angry, betrayed, disappointed are all normal feelings to have when something emotionally hurts us, but every feeling is temporary. So before you act on that emotion, think twice.
All throughout my childhood, and as I journeyed through my adolescent years and into my shiny, somewhat over-rated, adult years, I have always been taught to treat people how I want to be treated- not how other people treat me. Living by this meant that, over the years, I found myself in situations where I have felt hard done by. Having to accept certain behaviours that I would never display to another. I felt sorry for myself sometimes. You know, the question we all ask ourselves from time to time: Why Me?
Why is it that I was finding myself in positions where people were hurting me? Now, this is not to say I am a completely perfect human being- by any stretch of the imagination, I’m not. I still questioned why others treated me in a way that I didn’t appreciate. But, by being taught such a simple thought process as a young woman has allowed me to ultimately become an emphatic individual, who understands other people, even when the circumstances are difficult to comprehend. Even when I sometimes feel mad when I am purposely hurt by another. Being taught to always treat others how I want to be treated- regardless of circumstances, is something that has rounded me as a person.
Everybody gets hurt at some stage. Some more than others, but what does it teach you? What did you learn from this? There is always one thing you can take away from every situation you find yourself in- other than feeling hurt. It is really important that you seek what this is, never waste your energy by just holding onto negativity. Eventually, this will wear you down. Take something from it, learn from it, and quit thinking that it is just wasted time- it’s really not. Everything has a lesson, and if you are using your intuition, following your gut feeling and listening to the way your body reacts to things, that lesson will become clear.
There is no better feeling than walking away from a situation where you are truly wishing nothing but happiness for another person- even when they didn’t wish you the same thing. Having the ability to accept a situation for what it was, acknowledge it and move forward is extremely empowering. This is not to say that you shouldn’t feel upset, you should and you will. However, life is way too short to hold onto negative thoughts about others, or to keep reminding yourself that you feel heart broken. What is the point in internalising these feelings? It will only make you bitter.
There is a major difference between being bitter towards another human being, and being strong and walking away. Both options have the same outcome, you are removing something or somebody from your life, but you are not expected to hold on to this forever. Walking away means letting it go entirely. By all means, be vocal and truthful about how this has affected you, but accept it for what it was, and what it will never be.
Being better doesn’t mean you need to be better than the other person, or that you are better than another person. Being better means, being better for you and only you. There are only two options to choose from when you are put into a situation where you are being emotionally tormented: you can either walk away, move forward with yourself and rebuild what has been damaged, or you can walk away and torture yourself with all that has happened.
There is nothing pleasing about feeling bitter towards another person, it might suit your feelings at the time, but in the end, this doesn’t impact anybody but you. Unfortunately, not everybody has the same heart as you, and not everybody will value you as they should. Don’t get angry at these types of people, their path is not the same as yours- where you are heading is not the same place as them. Learn from the experience, take from it an important lesson and close the chapter. Hold no bad feelings towards another, wish them well with their journey, and turn your focus to you and your own wellbeing. Be better, never bitter.
Love yourself enough to recognise when something is good for you, and when something is not good for you. Don’t ignore the signs. Be brave enough to make decisions that solely impact you and your own journey.